A man walks into a bar and sits next to his freind. He reaches into his coat pocket and pulls out a little piano and stool . He then reaches into his coat and pulls out a little man who sits at the piano and begins to play "Fur Elise". His freind says "Where did you get that ?!" The mans says "Well I was walking on the beach and I found a brass lamp. I rubbed it and a genie came out and granted me one wish. He must have been hard of hearing because he thought I wished for a 10 inch pianist".

Town dweller visits a farm and asks: "Hello Farmer, Can you tell me why those cows have no horns?"
The farmer looks at him and replies: "What's the matter with you city folk? The bells ain't loud enough for ya?"